How To Not Future Embarrass Your Offspring

SPA in a corner

SPA in a corner

How To Not Future Embarrass Your Offspring In 4 Easy Steps:

1. 

You might want to consider limiting the amount of photos you post on instagram and also curate with the brain of a future discerning teenager in mind. Videos should probably remain offline and feel free to keep that diary of your child to a select group of friends.

2. 

If you are a stage performer, maybe keep the subject of your kid(s) to a minimum on stage. No future young adult wants to have a second hand account of their life available to watch on some shaky camera footage via YouTube.

3.

Do you paint or illustrate? I am begging you to direct your passion beyond the cute little one you take care of. Is their face ever going to be red when they see a tapestry depicting them dancing their butt off to Beyoncé’s Lemonade.

4. 

If you happen to be an animator, just say no to baby animated short films. These kids have to live in a future filled with bullies and frenemies who will feast off this sort of thing.

 

Now that we have that unpleasantness behind us, I’d like to proudly announce that my live storytelling and animated show, Baby Put Me in a Corner, is coming to OFF JFL July 23rd. Hear all about an unplanned pregnancy, cute baby and more!  

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Steve Patrick Adams

Steve Patrick Adams is a comedian, writer, animator, cartoonist, and soon to be a pretty rad Dad. He has been performing stand-up and sketch comedy for over six years across Canada and has written for such media outlets as Bite TV, CBC Punchline, and Mashable. Steve most recently worked as a producer for Bite TV and has created animations for both the station and for his own site, stevepatrickadams.com. You can see regular webcomics and animations on his site and see him perform live with Chuckle Co. at Comedy Bar in Toronto, and with a variety of other comics at Comedy Works in Montreal. Steve currently resides in Montreal but has spent most of his comedic career in Toronto. Virtually all his gawky teenage years were spent in the small town of Beamsville, Ontario.